Folks, listen up! We’ve got a great deal here – this is the mega deal of the century folks, a fantastic deal we’ve worked on, tremendous.
We’re gonna have the best golf country in the entire world right over here in the Northern hemisphere. These Brits are gonna love it cause we’re gonna re locate them to Paris France, where all the great shopping is, and they’re gonna re settle in Norwegian countries with the best spas and saunas. The Brits are gonna have a better quality of life once they’re relocated in these beautiful places believe me, great houses, better healthcare, cheap chicken.
The UK’s already got beautiful golf courses – I know, I’ve got two of them, and folks, this is a green green country with tremendous potential for courses all over – they have green spaces everywhere, especially in Scotland, great place for real estate – we’ll build great golf clubs, beautiful hotels. And we’re developing this so fast you won’t believe. We can cover the UK with amazing courses like you’ve never seen. And, folks, this will come with tariff-free Scotch whiskey, I’ve negotiated this tremendous deal. and the chance to take part in big new mega events, folks – shooting with the monarchs in Balmoral Palace, Scotland.
The First Lady and I, we had a tremendous welcome from the Queen, a few years back, fantastic, and now her son’s taken over, just think of all those palaces to visit – a day on the green, folks, followed by tea with the King and it’s yours for the simple sign-up to our new world order. His mom would be tremendously proud.
by Alison Campbell, with image by Martin Gollan
